Sudden silence: A bit more: "A bit more A bit more sleep, a bit more of time in the Shower, bit more of time ..... bit more of solitude, bit more of tears,a bit more......."
Just one text message, three misplaced beautiful words and a sender who was a close friend till then, was enough for my 6 years of building to come crashing down into mud and stones.... The message blew everything away my love, my life, my family, my friends, everyone and everything i called mine After getting discharged from the hospital she decided to leave me .She had walked in my life when my life was rotting in drugs n pulled me out of it and left it to rot again. I had taken a never ending leave drowned in the depth of my sorrow i had stated drinking...not actually started but going by the amount of spirit that entered my body ..may be....with no responsibilities no restriction no deadlines, i was a free soul,i knew that it wasn’t the solution but i was helpless. A month had passed, with no soul being around i longed to hear someone touch, someone listen, to someone to feel. Draped in a red saree, she walked in the dark room. Picked up the pillow, pulled the cha
Sometimes it seems our brain is the most adamant and lazy viewer, all it wants is entertainment, , all it wants is spice in what he sees and thus muddles up our preconceived notions to just abstract ideas ,our principles to lame thoughts and promises to words uttered in plain aggression . At my teenage marriage was something that brings a new girl to your home, as life progressed it seemed as a way produce babies,a passport to get laid, soon a new word got added to the list RESPONSIBILITY, that changed the whole dimension to my definition of marriage. Suddenly i was swaying away from marriage. I saw a helpless part in every women i met a part that would drag me to my basics, clip my wings ,cut down my new found freedom , freedom from obligations to my parents ,freedom from pretending to be an ideal teenager. At no cost i wanted to lose that, at no cost i wanted to sit down make a budget for my spending for the next month, count every penny i spent, analyze hundred fa
A bit more A bit more sleep, a bit more of time in the Shower, bit more of time ..... bit more of solitude, bit more of tears,a bit more........of her... I always wanted to chase down my future,grab its neck, bring him to his knees and then smartly walk past by it.I dreamt of it and every single day kept getting close to it inch by inch ,inch by inch and then suddenly..... life came to a halt.it had stopped for 3minutes atleast and then.. started crawling like a snail.. a creature which uses almost 60% of its body part to move.Well, i was easily in a deeper shithole, i had to convince every 365 bones of mine, along with its fleshier relatives to MOVE.Moving from one work to another took me years. Not that i was slow,i didnt wanna be fast...i wanted to see her laugh, wanted to see those blessed saturdays,that smile she gave after cracking a cheap joke, our booze fridays, our trip to goa, my first promotion,our first night i felt immersed into them falling down.....down the to the deep
Wanting for that 'bit more' will always be there and that is what makes us strive for it and keeps us going.
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